The Importance of Changing Your Pro-Choice Friend's Heart

June 24, 2021

When we die, each of us will give an account of how we lived our lives. We will face the question, "What did you do for the least of these?" Certainly, unborn children -- the most vulnerable among us who truly have no voice -- will be included in "the least of these."

It can be challenging to make time to defend life in the womb. Of course there are regular opportunities -- attending the March for Life, praying and fasting as part of 40 Days for Life, getting involved in legislative efforts that protect life in the womb, and supporting a local pregnancy resource center are just a few wonderful ways to speak out in defense of life. All of these are incredibly important and are largely responsible for the continued decline in the U.S. abortion rate and the overwhelming number of laws that have passed defending the unborn.

Perhaps the greatest challenge members of pro-life movement face, though, is that of changing the hearts and minds of people with whom we regularly come into contact. Talking with strangers about the life issues is usually not a problem. After all, our Lord calls us to speak out for the unborn, and when we do not know a person, it's easier to have a contentious conversation. Talking with friends or family members whom we love and know disagree with us on the life issue is much more challenging.

Abortion touches the lives of far more men and women than most realize. Guttmacher estimates that 19 percent of women will have had will have had at least one abortion by the age of 30. Each of the aborted babies had a mother and a father, grandparents, aunts and uncles, family friends, and perhaps siblings multiplying the trauma caused by those abortions well beyond 19 percent of women. Because of this, conversations surrounding abortion are often deeply personal and emotional, touching wounds that people would rather leave buried.

But conversations -- especially conversations with friends and family members -- are essential to changing the world's attitude toward the unborn. Changing laws is necessary to make abortion illegal, but changing hearts is what is necessary to make abortion unthinkable.

That is why Family Research Council has recently published a new resource, How to Change Your Pro-Choice Friend's Heart. Complete with five tips to keep in mind when discussing any controversial topic with a loved one, five pro-life stories and arguments that change hearts, and five responses to be prepared for when having this challenging conversation, this resource attempts to equip pro-lifers with the tools to defend the dignity of the human person with love.

Ultimately, God is the one who can change the hardest of hearts, but each of us needs to do our part as God's chosen instrument. While talking with a friend or family member about abortion might sound intimidating, the conversation does not have to be a heated one; instead, it can be a beautiful opportunity to show God's love and mercy for the men and women who have been involved in abortion, and God's loving care for the unborn.

If bringing up the topic of abortion is scary, start in an innocuous way by mentioning something like "Did you know that six weeks after conception an unborn baby has fingers?" Open the door and see where God directs the conversation. And hopefully one day, God will say, "I was attacked in the womb, and you defended me even to your friends and family…Well done, good and faithful servant."